Sonder

My favourite word in the whole world is Sonder.

It’s pretty. It sounds nice and it has a beautiful meaning. (It’s also the name of a wine bar in my neighbourhood but that’s irrelevant!)

So ….. Sonder means:

“The realisation that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own”

It’s word that came about through The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, a genius publication that manages to articulate a vast array of human emotions and observations and put a word to them.

I love this one the most because when you feel it, it is overwhelming. How can 7 billion people (and the countless trillions that went before them) be as complicated as me?

It’s a lovely reminder that this is not The Truman Show, you are not all starring in a mini series about my life. I am little and we are all precious.

IKEA

I

K eep

E very

A llenkey

My most favourite thing about IKEA is the exit. The path to freedom; where you can sit cross legged and exhausted on the travelator down to the car park, mop your brow and give yourself a well earned pat on the back for surviving – and if you can’t reach your back you can use that long fluro green paddle-like object you bought in the nik nak section purely because you didn’t have one.

You have to hand it to the Scandinavians, they really are a smart bunch. I mean they could’ve stopped 86 years ago when they gave us LEGO, but no, they quickly followed it up with IKEA and then for dessert they gave us ABBA.

But I digress ….

My second favourite thing? The little trolleys in the cafe that your tray fits on. I swear to God they should sell them. Everyone wants to drive it. Everyone wants to clear the table. Kids are even excited about stacking the dishes and separating the rubbish. It’s genius and every family should have one. Heck I’d even buy the trays to go on them!

So what brought us to IKEA on this Sunday morning? Was it because we were down to our last 100 tea lights candles? Was it maybe that we had finally cracked open our third last packet of 20 bag clips? Or maybe we were just sick of opening the laundry cupboard and having 18 years of blue IKEA bags fall out?

No, not just all of that, it was for a new desk for our daughter. She’s moving rooms you see and the husband, whose penchant for interior design is EXHAUSTING, thought she should have a corner desk.

So did we buy a corner desk?

No.

Did we buy an unnecessary desk chair, 8 storage baskets, 16 coat hangers, felt feet for our furniture, a lint remover and Swedish Meatballs?

Yes.

Yes we did.

My third favourite thing: The registers, especially the self serve section for those who love not interacting with people. Unlike the supermarkets, IKEA let us use the little gun scanners. Next level scanning for a pro like me. So as we approach the checkouts I craftily pass a dollar to my daughter and send her off for a hot dog, position myself in front of my husband, arrive at the checkout first with arms out wide and I declare to everyone that “I got this”.

And then: Silence. As we remember that all 18 blue IKEA bags are still in the laundry cupboard at home.

So there you have it. Our annual family outing to IKEA – The one-way marathon of shopping expeditions. Why go from A to B in a shop when you can go via Z taking twists and turns for hours on end.

Until next year – Adjo (that’s Swedish for Goodbye – according to google)

The Simple Pleasures

A list of the simple pleasures in life – no explanation required

1. A warm bath

2. A cool pillow

3. A tight hug

4. A purring cat

5. A friendly smile

6. A green light

7. A bright moon

8. A raging sea

9. A laughing child

10.A knowing look

11.A soft blanket

12.A blue sky

13.A convenient parking

spot

14.A loyal dog

15.A romantic gesture

16.A witty punchline

17.A random compliment

18.A good hair day

19.A waft of aftershave

20.A sense of belonging

Consumerism can go get knotted. We got this life thing sorted.

Driving to work … a Cautionary Tale

I’m cruising in the traffic

Belting out a song

When suddenly I realise

That something is quite wrong

The speed limit is sixty

And that is what I’m doing

But the car that is behind me

Is frustrated with the queuing

The car’s so close, it appears to me

That it seems to have no bonnet

I mean, I can’t actually see one

Just a face with a frown upon it

Maybe she thinks she knows me

I can see right up her nose

My goodness I can even see

The labels on her clothes

I slow down and then I think

“This girl just needs a cuddle”

I slow some more and contemplate

Her world is in a muddle

Suddenly she overtakes

Doing a very dangerous speed

She’s really in a hurry

Of course I let her take the lead

So I just wave and give a smile

I mean, what else can I to do?

She waves back with her middle finger

And yells out “oh fuck you”

Friends, the moral of the story is:

If you are wanting me to speed,

Don’t drive up my arse or else

I’ll go very slow indeed

Facebook and other myths

I once said to a group of friends that one of the best things about our generation is that we can enjoy the benefits of social media without being persecuted by it.  This pearl of wisdom was followed by a long silence, a big gulp of our respective margaritas and much laugher that we had reached that profound part of the night.

The young ‘uns of today have no fear of repercussions but we do. We are often timid in our approach to new technology and social media forums and through our fear we are also respectful AND we care about what people think of us. This is of course a massive generalisation but I think its mostly true.

However we do still fall victim to believing what we read:

– The sick kid who needs a 1000 likes to get donations for their treatment (who would wait for FB likes to cure a dying child?)

– The posts that tell us we must fix our settings or we won’t see our friends’ posts

– The free giveaways that will only eventuate if we share … but strangely never do

– The perfect family holiday (that had whinging kids and tense parents 80% of the time)

– The perfect family shot (that was one of 27 otherwise bad ones)

– The world’s cutest puppy (that cried all night and just shat on the floor)

– The date night (that was actually more necessary that anyone could’ve imagine)

– The “natural” selfie (that has the pretty Snapchat filter)

The biggest issue we face today is not knowing what to believe. How do we know if what we are seeing is real? Well, for the most part we don’t. All we need to know is that what we are seeing is not the FULL picture; it’s the bits that people want us to know and that’s okay too. So love the pretty pics, like the perfect holiday posts and LOL at the (pooping) pooches, just don’t measure your life against them.

 

 

 

Can I get you a coffee?

Almond latteBeing 43, I have drunk a lot of coffee in my time. But it occurred to me recently that when I order my almond latte every morning, I sound like a wanker. I mean, a year ago you couldn’t get even almond milk in most cafes . Who even knew you could milk an almond?!

Then I realised that, like my life, my coffee habits have evolved (and arguably improved) over the years. I am a long way from the weak skinny cappacino with 2 sugars of my 20s. I have moved on from the latte with 1 sugar of my 30s.

In my 40s I have matured just enough to finally admit that lactose and I will never be friends and I am overjoyed that soy milk is not my only option.

Almond Latte is my blog about life’s journey. I am who I am because of my 43 years. I am proud to say that I am currently the best version of myself, but that’s not to say that I am not still evolving. I am no longer skinny and weak. I am strong and slightly nutty. Some people like me and some don’t.

Welcome, pop your feet up and enjoy. Can I get you a coffee?